I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
