The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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