Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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