You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
