I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
