I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
