At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
