Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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