i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
You ate ashes out of my bong
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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