how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
