And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
