Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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