Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
she pinky promised me she was 18
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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