bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
my poor anus
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize