so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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