so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
