pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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