Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
