that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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