in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
