In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
