the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
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