She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Barsexuality is the new black.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
