I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
