About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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