just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Did I show you my penis last night?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
