I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
