One girl and one boy is just not enough.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
