i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Also, beer. Big fan.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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