I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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