At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
