bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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