So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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