Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Im just a social blackout drinker.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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