I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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