apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
