Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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