I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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