I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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