I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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