How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
