Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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