you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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