scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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