i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
