you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
