You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
