We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
