those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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