That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
She announced her abortion via fbk
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize