yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
