Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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